Why I Fired My Secretary...

Two weeks ago was my forty-fifth birthday, and I wasn't feeling

Too hot that morning anyway.



I went to breakfast knowing my wife

Would be pleasant and say ?Happy Birthday,?



And would probably have a present for me.

She didn't even say ?Good Morning,? Let alone any ?Happy Birthday.?



I thought, ?Well, that's wives for you. Maybe the children will remember .?

The children came in to breakfast and didn't say a word.



When I started to the office I was feeling pretty low and despondent.

As I walked into my office, my secretary, Janet , said,



?Good morning boss, Happy Birthday.?

So I felt a little better; someone had remembered.



I worked until noon. Then Janet knocked on my door and said,

?You know, it's such a beautiful day outside and it's your birthday,



let's go to lunch, just you and me.? I said, ?By George,

that's the best thing I've heard all day. Let's go. ?



We went to lunch. We didn't go where we normally go;

We went out into the country to a little private place.



We had two martinis and enjoyed lunch tremendously.

On the way back to the office, she said,



?You know, it's such a beautiful day.

We don't need to go back to the office, do we??



I said, ?No, I guess not.? She said, ?Let's go to my apartment.?

After arriving at her apartment she said, ?Boss, if you don't mind ,



I think I'll go into the bedroom and slip into something more comfortable.?

?Sure,? I excitedly replied. She went into the bedroom and,



In about six minutes, she came out carrying a big birthday cake,

Followed by my wife, children and dozens of our friends.


All were singing ? Happy Birthday? And there on the couch I sat... Naked.


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